I have been reading Margie @ Third Mom for some times now and I just keep coming back to her blog. For what I can see in the adoption blog community, she looks to me like a central person, who by her experience, research and listening has been able to be appreciated and respected by all the members of the adoption triad: the first Moms, the adults Adoptees and the Adoptive Parents.
She is wise beyond measure and has enough perspective to be open to every idea, every opinion (or that's how I perceive her).
In a recent post she confronts us with the loss of our children first parents and wonders if instead of asking wrong questions we should not instead answer properly to them. Go read her here if you haven't done so already.
Adjustment by Janet
I have already linked to Janet and could do it more often if I wasn't so lazy on this blog. She is a wonderful woman and Mom who has a wicked sens of humour to make us laugh but also speaks from her heart to make us think.
In one of her recent posts she opened up about the fact that her son still shows a lack of trust after 8 months in Canada and that it is step by step, day by day that they build his confidence and affection.
She reminded to all adoptive parents a truth we often read only on adults adoptees blogs:
"How can you explain that a child cannot just leave his or her WHOLE OTHER LIFE behind, and smile cheerily and never look back?"
Go read the rest of it here if you haven't already.
Thanks again Janet for being so honest about your family experience and sharing it with us.
We often forget to acknowledge the many losses of our children, only seeing the gain we did.
In one of her recent posts she opened up about the fact that her son still shows a lack of trust after 8 months in Canada and that it is step by step, day by day that they build his confidence and affection.
She reminded to all adoptive parents a truth we often read only on adults adoptees blogs:
"How can you explain that a child cannot just leave his or her WHOLE OTHER LIFE behind, and smile cheerily and never look back?"
Go read the rest of it here if you haven't already.
Thanks again Janet for being so honest about your family experience and sharing it with us.
We often forget to acknowledge the many losses of our children, only seeing the gain we did.
A new Year!
My best belated wishes for the New Year!
Sorry I haven't been very active on this blog (neither on the other one, the personal one, to be honest). I have been having so many mix feelings about adoption in the past months, with this wait still growing and my readings of adoptees blogs, ethical websites, first parents search forums...
Sorry I haven't been very active on this blog (neither on the other one, the personal one, to be honest). I have been having so many mix feelings about adoption in the past months, with this wait still growing and my readings of adoptees blogs, ethical websites, first parents search forums...
Don't get me wrong I still consider adoption the best thing that happened to our family since it made M our daughter but it's just that now I fully realize it wasn't a win-win for everybody and that someone (and most definitely more than one person) lost a lot in it too.
I am ashamed to say I was pretty ignorant...
I don't really know where I am going with this blog but for now I guess I'll keep it online, at least to have a quick way to re-read amazing posts that give me hope and remind me that so much good comes from adoption too.
Love,
Lying on the couch last night, by Kris
Kris writes with her heart, her soul, her whole self...every time I read her I have goosebumps as she can describes her feelings and thoughts like nobody.
When she speaks to her daughter to come, all her love and hopes are palpable...visit her post from January 1st.
When she speaks to her daughter to come, all her love and hopes are palpable...visit her post from January 1st.
1 Love, 2 Paths by Laurie
There is a question a lot of us wonder even if we don't want to admit it: is the same to give birth to a child and love him/her than to adopt a child and love him/her? Can we create the same kind of bound and relationship? Can we compare?
Laurie, true to herself, frank and generous, has shared with us her feelings in this very touching and honest post. She gave birth to a beautiful little girl a few months ago after adopting 2 amazing boys from Vietnam. And even with 3 kiddos under 2 she still manages to make us think: 1 Love, 2 Paths.
Laurie, true to herself, frank and generous, has shared with us her feelings in this very touching and honest post. She gave birth to a beautiful little girl a few months ago after adopting 2 amazing boys from Vietnam. And even with 3 kiddos under 2 she still manages to make us think: 1 Love, 2 Paths.
It's Okay to Say "I am Sorry" in Adoption by Paula
Adoption is a wonderful way to build or grow a family. Adoption is seen for many as a "win-win" situation: a child founds a family who loves him and cares for him, siblings found a brother or a sister, parents found a son or daughter...
Often we forget about the losses that had to append in order for this adoption to be. Paula, in this amazing post reminds us that not only do we need to listen to our kids when they want to express their grief and anger, results of theses losses, but we also need to acknowledge their feelings for them to feel we understand.
Often we forget about the losses that had to append in order for this adoption to be. Paula, in this amazing post reminds us that not only do we need to listen to our kids when they want to express their grief and anger, results of theses losses, but we also need to acknowledge their feelings for them to feel we understand.
My blood is better than your blood by Janet
Most of the adoptive parents who also have biological children will tell you: "different way, same love". It seems unless you have lived it, people have difficulties to understand it as this very good post shows us.
Janet has 6 children: 4 in Canada, 2 waiting for her in Africa for just a few more days! Bon voyage!
Janet has 6 children: 4 in Canada, 2 waiting for her in Africa for just a few more days! Bon voyage!
Web of fear by Kris
Nobody never knows what the future holds for them and for their future child when they start the process of adoption. During the process, the paperwork, the wait we all have doubts and questions. Especially when the wait gets long and we have even more time to think about what if...
Kris, who is always true to herself and her faith, wrote about this fear in a very honest post.
Kris, who is always true to herself and her faith, wrote about this fear in a very honest post.
To those in waiting...from when I was by Senja
Senja speaks real, the good and the bad, the beautiful and the ugly, the fun and the sad.
She calls herself crazy but in this post she was just true: true to her feelings of a mom in waiting.
She calls herself crazy but in this post she was just true: true to her feelings of a mom in waiting.
I never dreamed by Stephanie
I never dreamed was written by Stephanie about her beautiful daughter Sophia adopted from China.
She expresses all her love for her in this text, how her life has changed for better since she's been in her life and how it has opened a whole new world to her.
She expresses all her love for her in this text, how her life has changed for better since she's been in her life and how it has opened a whole new world to her.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
